I often hear people cry out in pain, “Oh God, I don’t deserve this!” There are things in this world that can cause the most excruciating hurts. At those times we look around and we see people who live far worse lives than we do, lives that ignore or openly defy God. These people appear to have no problems and no pain, and we wonder “why?” We serve God and this has happened to us. They ignore God and live seemingly carefree lives. We struggle; they abide in ease. And we shout to the heavens, “God, I don’t deserve this!”
But that begs the question, what do we deserve? Ezekiel tells us just what we deserve, death. “For every living soul belongs to me, the father as well as the son—both alike belong to me. The soul who sins is the one who will die.” [18:4]
That’s not an easy concept to absorb, and when we do, we will find ourselves crying out like Isaiah, “I am undone!” But just as God did not leave Isaiah undone, neither does he leave us undone. For “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” [Romans 5:8 NIV]
God did not give me the justice I so richly deserved, instead, while I was a sinner, He poured out his mercy upon me.
When I look with my heart at Jesus, I find myself crying out “Oh God, I don’t deserve this! I was Your enemy, a lawbreaker deserving justice. That You would send the most precious gift of Your Only Son to a Roman cross to die for me is almost too unbelievable to contemplate. Instead of punishment as Your enemy, Your Son paid for my sins.”
Instead of an outcast lawbreaker, I am adopted into the family of God. I am a child of God. No longer estranged from my Father and deserving death, now I reside in God’s heart and one day I will reside in His house. “Oh God, I truly don’t deserve this!”
